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The Persephone Complex

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Layout by Swoon for the Moon. Copywright of Holly Cassell and The Persephone Complex 2014.

let’s talk about pants

boux avenue review
Most of my life I’ve been a confirmed lazy cow when it comes to lingerie. It’s always been one of those things that I love to look at, but never really get around to spending my money on. Given a spare 20 quid, for most of my life I would have spent it on magazines, make-up, a new top or a big plastic bag full of junk food. This is largely due to the fact that for most of my teens, I was seriously unhappy with my body. I didn’t want to think about how I looked in lingerie, let alone try some on in a shop; a shop with evil mirrors and thin, petite sales assistants (I live in Wales, all our sales assistants are petite and tanned and so friendly it makes me want to cry). I was a girl-boxer-shorts-from-Tammy nightmare until I was about 19, and then finally lost all my puppy fat, and my crippling body shame with it. I’m by no means a stick-thin girl (I’m usually an 8 or a 10, and in no way tiny at 5’10) but the main difference is that I simply don’t give a shit any more. My boyfriend has rid me of any lingering shame I had left, and now I spend the majority of my time indoors naked. Not naked and sucking my stomach in. Not naked and in complete darkness. Naked naked. Eating pizza hunched over my laptop with sauce on my boob naked.

But anyway, this post isn’t about nakedness, it’s about pants. Naturally as my attitude to nudity has changed, as has my attitude to underwear. I wear less and less the older I get. Nowadays I wear the kind of pants that to my Nan, resemble something you would truss a ham in. You may have seen on my Twitter that I recently discovered, much to my amazement, that g-strings ARE actually comfortable, and now I don’t really wear anything else. VPL is a thing of the past (or should I say, thong of the past, haha haha ha) and recently some very pretty garters and corsets and stockings have filled my drawers. I still own a few dodgy pairs of ‘period pants’ (and the Most Awful Phrase Award goes to….!) but there’s also some very lovely stuff from Westward Bound, Boux Avenue, Ann Summers and Topshop that I make a habit of wearing every day, rather than ‘saving it’ (for what?! FOR WHAT?!). Primark has been my favourite hunting ground lately, especially for 3-packs of pastel stripper-thongs and g-strings. I feel the most confident in a high-rise design with very little detailing. For me that is the magic formula, but everyone is different, and in order to discover your magic formula, you have to try things on. Nobody likes a muffin top, so I always suggest trying knickers out for size (over your own, obviously) before you buy. It just saves money and self-loathing.

The only thing left to talk about, really, is hair. Yes, I’m going to go there. I wouldn’t be me if I didn’t go there, would I? Some people don’t like wearing tiny pants when they have a big bush sticking out the sides, and I get that, I do. But life is short. So don’t match your briefs to your bikini line if you don’t want to. Being shaved is nice if you like feeling smooth. Otherwise, let it all hang out. No shave, no shame.

And if anyone says they can see your bra, tell them you’re glad, because it’s cute as hell and cost you 40 quid.

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18 Comments:

At 2 May 2014 11:07 , Blogger Niki said...

I love what you bought, somehow shopping for g-strings makes me so fucking happy.xx

dreaming is believing

 
At 2 May 2014 14:04 , Blogger Enid Twiglet said...

YES!!! I love this - no shave, no shame. You, dear lady are awesome xx

 
At 2 May 2014 19:01 , Blogger Maija said...

yes yes yes people need to talk about this more hahaha, also I love when people can see my pretty lacey bra straps, I bought cute lingerie for a reason! x

 
At 2 May 2014 20:56 , Blogger Neens said...

Primarni does the best tacky stripper underwear, I'm a huge, huge fan:-) Glad you've come over to the lingerie dark side. I'm far from the skinniest bird out there, but I love that in an office where we have to keep it fairly conservative, I can wear hold ups and racy lacys underneath a dreary outfit and no one but me knows:-) It's fab for confidence. Great post lady xX

 
At 2 May 2014 21:18 , Blogger Katie said...

i need some cute undies, I've moved on from boyshorts but even so, my current choice just ain't cutting it. it's totally awesome to wear nice bras and pants though, it makes me feel so much better- I think because you know that you're the only one who gets to enjoy it, and what's better than that? great post as ever doll! xx

 
At 2 May 2014 22:22 , Blogger Corinne said...

Haha, I love the closing line of this!

I went through a thong stage, then I went through a no knickers stage and now I'm a black lace/french knicker kind of girl!

Corinne x
www.skinnedcartree.com

 
At 2 May 2014 23:35 , Blogger Anna Robinson said...

I do love nice undies, I need a shopping trip, I'm still wearing my post-pregnancy knicks, not very appealing to be honest. I'll check out Primarni next time I'm near one - there isn't one near me! I love your view of hair - I hate shaving and don't always find the time to neatly trim haha!!!
Anna xx

 
At 4 May 2014 01:23 , Blogger Olia said...

Your post made me feel empowered. Just today, I was looking at laptops in a store and while testing the built-in camera on one of them saw my face on the screen and felt really bad because I looked like I had a double chin! In reality, I know logically I am not fat (and feel good about my body most of the time) so it was just an unflattering angle rather than an ugly me (the same as clothes, such as undies, won't all fit perfectly until you find what is most flattering and comfortable for you).

 
At 4 May 2014 09:12 , Blogger The Adventures of a Shopaholic said...

lovely post :)

Marianna,
THE ADVENTURES OF A SHOPAHOLIC
THE ADVENTURES OF A SHOPAHOLIC ON FACEBOOK

 
At 4 May 2014 12:00 , Blogger Gail J said...

I totally understand! I'm the one who don't really wearing tiny panties due to the same reason you've mentioned in the post lol However, these looks sexy and the pink one is so cute! xx

 
At 4 May 2014 15:58 , Blogger Laura said...

the past few years i've grown to appreciate having pretty knickers&bras more, but i still have the mentality of rather spending my money on something else (e.g. food). lingerie can be so ridiculously expensive! but it is nice to splurge on something pretty and i honestly would use that last line, hehe! xx

 
At 5 May 2014 09:12 , Blogger Jodie said...

I need to invest in more cute undies as my period pants are becoming my everyday pants recently- what is it with cute ones disappearing?
I'm a naked eating pizza girl too ;)

 
At 5 May 2014 19:13 , Blogger Kelly-Ann Maddox said...

I think that even during the periods when I was happy with my body (as now), I didn't want to prioritise undies. I dunno - I'm more interested in spending on stuff that I can use for creativity or SEE on my body all day when I'm walking around.

A new sexual relationship. That's the time to do it. That's when it makes the top of the list.

I love your blog. I always return to it when I need a mental and visual stimulant.

Tea For Two

 
At 6 May 2014 07:28 , Blogger ThisGirlLovesChic said...

your blog is fab!! cute undies always make a girl feel a little better in my opinion!

This Girl Loves Chic 

Facebook : ThisGirlLovesChic 


xx

 
At 6 May 2014 21:44 , Blogger Charlotte Smith said...

Haha, this post made me smile! xx

 
At 10 May 2014 14:20 , Blogger Peet said...

Of course g-strings are comfortable, woman!!:) I only wear g-strings all the time. Out and about under jeans — a g-string. Out at a club under a skirt — a g-string. At home under sweatpants — a g-string. Always. And I hate it when anything is prickling out so I deforest my bush regularly.:) But anyhow, about self-image... I was a lot like you, I shed my weight even later and my boyfriend helped me to feel good naked A LOT. Now I just wanna walk around naked to the point where he's like: "Dude, come on, put on some clothes.":D

 
At 12 May 2014 01:09 , Blogger Panty Buns said...

We may have different taste in the styles of knickers we wear, but it looks like we have the same taste in colours! Your suspender belt and haul of pants is lovely! I love the satin bows. Except for the back seam and lack of colour I guess my taste runs closer to the pair of "big pants" from the movie "Bridget Jones' Diary". With respect to the hair, now I don't feel so bad about not getting that "Brazilian" waxing I'd considered. As for ""period pants" I rather like the looks of full brief satin panties in purples/maroons/blacks with generous cotton lined gussets. Tho me, the pants you pictured look like they are designed to be seen. I suspect you'd like some of the pants by Cosabella. I just reviewed some "big pants" in my latest post titled: "Shadowline and Victorias Secret Lingerie Fashion OOTDs and Reviews with Dressing Room Selfie Photos and Video with Blooper"
I think it's wonderful that you are comfortable with your body and being naked. I could have used more of that kindo of confidence when making my last video (you can hear the nervousness in my voice).
Being naked eating pizza by the computer sounds good to me, but I'll probably at least have my satin "pants" on (I love how they feel).

 
At 9 July 2014 10:57 , Blogger Rachel Jones said...

Brillant post. This has brightened up my gloomy welsh day. Glad I found you (new follower here!) I have period pants too!
Rachel x
www.heartoceansecrets.blogspot.co.uk

 

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